Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Day 22: The Corpse

R.I.P.
Hattie Gaertneri, born December, 2007, died, Jan 13, 2009. Hattie was ruthlessly murdered by a member of the household who recklessly opened the window behind it, when it was frickin' 36 degrees below zero before windchill. The wind was blowing from the north, at approximately a windspeed of 15 miles per hour, resulting in a windchill of between 40 and 50 below zero.

Rescue operations by the wiser female of the household, when she got home from work and came upon the scene, were unsuccessful and the victim was not responsive.

The suspect, with no legitimate defense, claimed that the kitchen was filled with smoke because of some kind of maniacal, poorly-thought-out cooking venture. Although window-opening is not unheard of under such circumstances, moving helpless life-forms to another window is often considered prudent and obvious. Epiphyte-slaughter charges have not yet been filed. A memorial will be held in the compost pile come spring.





19 comments:

Reds said...

You are too funny!!! TFS!! Poor plant :(

Susan said...

I love it! The story that is...I also have a black thumb when it comes to plants.

janett said...

Heh. That's so something I would do, I can't keep a plant alive ever.

shirley said...

Oh, the poor little plant. The window must have been open for a LONG time.

Sharon said...

This is SO sad. Will there be a trial? Or have you already convicted the murderer?

Kelly said...

Poor poor Hattie... Great journaling

Anonymous said...

Poor plant!

Margaret said...

Oh...rest in peace, Hattie! So sorry to hear of her demise.

Unknown said...

Oh no how sad. TFS.

Lauren Hartman said...

Awww, looks like a slow and painful death :(

Maria said...

Very funny story, Angela! Poor, poor plant.

Krista P said...

I feel ya.

Gypsy Girl(Brenda) said...

You are soooo funny. You got me laughing out loud here. My kids are gonna think Im nuts.

Mom2Drew said...

Awe man. But I'll be honest...I'm sooo glad it was not a person, ack!

Jodie said...

Love it! Something similar is happening here at the moment but not due cold etc but heat and neglect!! great story and photos!

Anonymous said...

HAHAHA...I just spit coffee out my nose! I feel badly for the plant but I think your journaling is brilliant.

Kristina said...

Wow, such strong words! I was worried at first you were talking about a person. It is a crime, though to treat an innocent bystanding plant so rudely!

Jeanne said...

Oh my goodness! Poor Hattie! To be killed off in such a manner is so sad. I hope the suspect is remorseful at least.

Your journaling of this is terrific. I hope someday he is forgiven!

Ron said...

I commend you on not reveling the identity of the said window opener and Hattie killer.