First things first: We've long known that The Beautiful Ms. Bonnie, at 15 3/4 years (96 according to the vet) is not likely going to live much longer. We take each day as "extra," as icing on the cake.
But it was still hard, Thursday, to take her to the vet with what we thought was a little toe nail problem and be told that she probably has foot cancer. In one of these photos you can see that her foot is quite bandaged and it's very hard for her to get around now. But oh! How she tries to follow us!
We're giving her a pain killer, watching her carefully, because if she's not comfortable and in quite a bit of pain, then we will say our final goodbyes to her. I don't know what she knows; I don't think she has an understanding as to why she's hurting. But she also doesn't have to "stare into the sun," as Yalom would put it, knowing that her death is imminent. She probably also doesn't quite know why we're letting her eat anything she wants to right now. Usually, we're quite careful, because long ago, we learned that her allergy to human foods meant much itching and scratching, but these days, treats are plentiful, and we're happy to give them to her!
Life. And it has such wonderful joys as well. Here's a few more photos from the glorious Grand Forks garden tour. How can there be this color in the same lands that has stark, soul-wrenching ice and snow?
7 comments:
Wow . . . Sadness and happiness in one post . . . all the more poignant for what you left out. Beautiful Ms. Bonnie and beautiful flowers . . .
Oh, I am so sorry to hear about your sad Bonnie news. I'm sure that is so difficult for you. Sending hugs your way!
Oh, I'm so sorry to hear about Ms. Bonnie. She is such a beautiful dog.
The flowers are really stunning.
It breaks my heart to read about Ms. Bonnie - I remember you mentioning her failing health and advanced age - but still...so so sorry she has come to this stage.
On a happier note - I love the composition of your last shot. It is amazing that the land that didn't show itself beneath the mounds of snow until almost summer has blessed everyone with beautiful color.
My heart goes out to you with regards to Ms Bonnie! Even when you know they've had a good long life, it's so hard letting go. I wish peace for all of you.
Your flowers pictures are simply gorgeous. I do believe this is your reward for surviving your winters! Remembering this gorgeousness in the midst of the frozen tundra to help you get through winter!
First - your flower photos are beautiful!
Most important though - I'm really sorry that Bonnie is sick. One of my cats got sick very suddenly in April and was diagnosed with cancer. I took the same approach that you did - watching for any signs of pain. It's so hard to know that the time you have is running short, but also a blessing. There's time to just stop and spend time being a real comfort.
Ms.Bonnie is a wonderful dog & she's lucky to have had such a life!
Laurie
I'm so sorry about Bonnie! I love seeing Bonnie's photos and her reading reviews are outstanding :)! I will keep her and your family in prayer.
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