Monday, March 30, 2009

"Eat your heart out, Dylan," says Sheila (mother of the ShamWow! Detractor)

This is my good buddy, Sheila, who is a very nice person, although she is the mother of the ShamWow! Detractor. Sheila agreed to pose for me outside our office, demonstrating a recent snow mountain. These mountains seem to appear suddenly, overnight, and we never have a Good Explanation for them: Here's one possibility-- earth-moving equipment comes during the night and builds these structures to toy with us because someone's GPS system SHOWS Grand Forks to be filled with mountains, and then tries to make reality conform to digital pixels. Grand Forks is, in fact, so flat that the horizon extends beyond the contours of the earth an extra 20 miles in all directions from the city.

It's probably a government program of some sort. Unfortunately, these bureaucrats may order more raw material, because we are being told that a potential blizzard is brewing to the west of us. Ever notice how things are often blamed on Mother Nature?



Now, innocent looking though Sheila may appear, she exacted a heavy price from me for her cooperation. Look what she made me let her do!!!!









These are NOT technically great photos, but I blame it on Sheila. She was in such rapture as she got to hold Shammy (I mean, ShamWow!), that it was hard to be in her presence and hold the camera still. (She even put Shammy through his paces and made him perform for her, soaking up water in the sink!)

FYI: The current Red River level is now at 48.91. Whether the blizzard hits here in Grand Forks, or just in Fargo, to the south, we're likely to see that moisture in our part of the river, as it makes its way north. Apparently, the Army Corps of Engineers has assembled a team of experts on ice jams. Experts on Ice Jams! Who Knew?

In Oslo, MN, there've been efforts to break up the ice jams with helicopter suspended wrecking balls smashing into the ice. I kid you not! Ok, I have a flood suggestion: with all the antsy Grand Forks people who don't get to sandbag (because of the "permanent dike solution") how about if we shovel all these mountains of snows onto railroad cars and ship it to drought stricken areas of the country? Who cares if it melts en route, as long as it hits some place drought stricken?

12 comments:

janett said...

Haha, you and that shamwow! So funny.

Margaret said...

Look at all that snow!!! Wow! And Shelia looks so enamored with that Sham Wow! (But who wouldn't, really?)

shirley said...

LOL on the ShamWow. I think I need to buy one....
We have the same mounds of snow that seem to appear next to our driveway. But our kids like the new mountains - they are definitely more fun than the flat prairie!

Jason said...

WOW the shamwow! I have not tried one of those yet. Nice pile of snow!

HLIP said...

I'm thinking that Sham Wow might be able to help w/the flooding if needed!

I enjoy your blog a bunch!
laurie

pat said...

Love the ShamWow shots--that looks like total bliss. And look at the "mountains" this way--they are still white and clean; no grit, no road dirt, none of the usual March cruddiness. I will hope that no more flooding comes your way. I think shipping out the snow is a GREAT idea!!

Barb said...

Everyone seems so enchanted with the shamwow! Bob says he absolutely forbids me to get one. He doesn't want to share me with shamwow. He said he is way too jealous.

e&ariggs said...

i just got my ShamWow a few days ago and boy do they work, especially with little ones around. I'm with you on the shamwow!!!!

love,amanda

Mandy said...

LOL...hahaha. You guys and your SHAM WOW. It must really be amazing. You seriously need to start charging this company for all of the business you are bringing their way.

Reds said...

You are too funny!!

Nicki, said...

I see a '12 Step ShamWow' program in the future for you two. LOL! And mountains (mysterious thou they may be) of snow - just what you need - right?!!

Jess said...

You are killing me! ROFLMAO! I noticed they now have ShamWow's at my local Wal-Mart... I am pretty sure one will make it into my cart today, resistance is futile! ;)